MIND --"I'm just lazy." This statement reconfirms your core belief that subconsciously, you are not worthy. Your first 8-10 years are when you're wired for something. And the challenge is to rewire your thinking. If anyone in your life, especially a person of authority, reinforced that you're not good enough, that wiring can be damaging. This isn't about blaming that person, it's about going back to figure out where you were imprinted to believe that other people's needs were more important than your own. If you don't have money for professional counseling, it requires unraveling where in your childhood you were made to believe that your opinions were not important.-- Oprah and Bob Greene of Best Life
BODY -- My father used to go to the grocery store with a shopping list and return with a large amount of xxxxx junk food...sometimes with or without the actual food my mother needed. I thought it strange at the time because my mom was such a frugal woman. Candy was rarely in the house, fresh fruits and milk were regulated (via her screaming "What happened to all the xxxxx?"), and lunch money was calculated to the penny (I was liberally scooping additional coins out of the coffee can to buy convenience store goodies which resulted in mom screaming "What happened to all the xxxxx?").
So what is the connection to the body section of my post? Well, I went to work, having budgeted out snack, transportation, lunch, and bill money, purposely leaving my cigarettes at home to "cut down" when a pang of xxxxx hit me. Chocolate or cigarettes? Both are about $1 and I strategically left both at home to stick to my plan. So why did I go in there and buy both? Because like my dad, I was looking to fill the void with one of my vices. How I wish running was my addiction! Actually, some runners need to have doctor ordered bed rest because they break bones and starve themselves or something like that. lol. "What happened to xxxxx?" Maybe next month when it warms up I will run to a farther store....to buy cigarettes and chocolate.
WORK -- 1) Whether or not a parent is happy with company policies, I can make their kid giggle like there's no tomorrow. And I'm okay with that.
2) All children are better when their parents are gone.
LANGUAGE BARRIER OR CULTURAL BRIDGE?
"You want to fighting me? I don't wanna fighting you."
"If I pay all, you don't go club, okay? Finish."
"Hungry Margaret is dangerous."
Lesson: Never argue on an empty stomach.
Cook: Kare ha nihon-jin desuka? (Your boyfriend, He's Japanese?)
Me: Hai.....Anatono karee ha totemo oishii! (Yes......Your curry is so delicious)
Cook: Iie, iie (no, no) My husband doesn't like curry.
Lesson - I am pronouncing curry incorrectly.
Monday, January 26, 2009
Thursday, January 22, 2009
commuter-cise, nose tampons (surgical mask optional), and a bowl of tonjiru
MIND - So I've been listening to Japanesepod 101 podcasts on my ipod on the way home from work everyday. I leave work at 6-ish and ride a company bike about 10 minutes to the subway station. Then, it's a 5 minute walk from the street to the platform. The first subway ride (Midosuji line Shinkanaoka Station to Doubutsuenmae station) takes about 15 minutes. Then I have to walk 5 minutes to the other line (Sakaisuji) and ride that subway to my home station (Kitahama). That takes about 15 minutes. THEN, I ride my own bike home which takes another 5 minutes and walk from the parking area to the elevator to reach my apartment an hour from clock-out time.
I always seem to fall asleep while listening. It reminds me of college...reading the same page in a chapter before entering lala land. I keep hoping that I will subconsciously retain some of the podcast, but I usually listen a second or third time. What is it with this language? From what I've read regarding language study, 10-15 minutes a day should help, but when co-workers talk to one another, I have no idea what they're saying. It's pretty ironic considering we're an English school. My Japanese teacher tells me I should keep a Japanese journal and my boyfriend is convinced I need to write in Japanese and study kanji. I'm sure they are both right, but it's hard to keep "studying" when I can't see the fruits of my labor. Realistically though, I know I'm not really studying...especially when my writing practice notebook has 30-45 days between entries.
I watch Japanese TV (no subtitles), Japanese movies and sitcoms (with subtitles--much more interesting) and listen to podcasts and watch video vocabulary quizzes on the ipod, but I guess without heart, I'm not fooling anyone. I know I'm on the verge of finding the method that will work for me, and I feel the weight of its importance on a daily basis, but since I survived Samoa without Samoan, I guess I'm okay with being illiterate most of the time. Shopping, web surfing, and trying to decide what to eat is when I get irritated about not knowing the lingo. Oh, and when I meet all these foreigners whose Japanese rolls of their tongues like butter, I get a twinge of jealousy right before I become overwhelmed with admiration.
My students (both toddler and adult) inspire me, though. They are doing it--speaking English--against the odds. English really is useless here, but they show up day after day, with their homework done (or tuition paid for the toddlers) all to attain bilingual status. Pretty cool, huh? So がんばります！(I'll do my best.)
BODY - I've been getting menstrual symptoms in my old age. I never used to have cramps, bloating, or get super moody (I used to be moody all the time) in my teen and 20's, but now, it seems like a second adolescence or something. So I hope I find a father for the child(ren) I may want to have soon before my scrambled eggs stop dropping.
WORK - One of my toddlers had a bloody nose for two days last week. Her mother mentioned yesterday that she noticed an odor and took the girl to the doctor to discover that a piece of tissue had gotten lodged in her nasal cavity. The mother was angry and thought a teacher put it up there. My Japanese co-teacher and I were insulted that she would think we would be stupid enough to do something like that. The office manager posed the question to the teachers in a way that could be construed as insulting and mentioned that we would take responsibility for not watching her closely enough.
Mind you, in Japan, they sell nose tampons for allergies and runny noses in general, which as an allergy sufferer I think is great. (People wear them with surgical masks....another post to explain...so you don't "see" the nose tampons if they have them in.) Culturally, this practice of inserting absorbent material into nostrils is well-known AND said toddler has a grandmother in the house. Mind you #2, this toddler is in don't-touch-me-i-can-do-it-myself phase so we barely get to wipe her nose during the day. Mind you #3, I stuck a screw up my nose at 3 1/2 years old and almost had to go to the hospital, but my mom (hardcore as she is) used a bobby pin in the doctor's office parking lot to remove it because she didn't want to pay money for something so crazy. Bottom line, learn cultural health practices when dealing with children!
TODAY - I made tonjiru. Man said it was good. I like miso anything, so it was easy for me to like. I really dig the youtube channel I found it on "Cooking with Dog." The cook makes it look so easy! I keep wondering who the narrator is, though. If you have any easy recipes that don't involve regular oven cooking or lots of prep space, let me know. I also prefer recipes with less than 8 ingredients and less than two cooking methods (e.g. frying and boiling but not frying, boiling, and kneading lol)...FYI.
I always seem to fall asleep while listening. It reminds me of college...reading the same page in a chapter before entering lala land. I keep hoping that I will subconsciously retain some of the podcast, but I usually listen a second or third time. What is it with this language? From what I've read regarding language study, 10-15 minutes a day should help, but when co-workers talk to one another, I have no idea what they're saying. It's pretty ironic considering we're an English school. My Japanese teacher tells me I should keep a Japanese journal and my boyfriend is convinced I need to write in Japanese and study kanji. I'm sure they are both right, but it's hard to keep "studying" when I can't see the fruits of my labor. Realistically though, I know I'm not really studying...especially when my writing practice notebook has 30-45 days between entries.
I watch Japanese TV (no subtitles), Japanese movies and sitcoms (with subtitles--much more interesting) and listen to podcasts and watch video vocabulary quizzes on the ipod, but I guess without heart, I'm not fooling anyone. I know I'm on the verge of finding the method that will work for me, and I feel the weight of its importance on a daily basis, but since I survived Samoa without Samoan, I guess I'm okay with being illiterate most of the time. Shopping, web surfing, and trying to decide what to eat is when I get irritated about not knowing the lingo. Oh, and when I meet all these foreigners whose Japanese rolls of their tongues like butter, I get a twinge of jealousy right before I become overwhelmed with admiration.
My students (both toddler and adult) inspire me, though. They are doing it--speaking English--against the odds. English really is useless here, but they show up day after day, with their homework done (or tuition paid for the toddlers) all to attain bilingual status. Pretty cool, huh? So がんばります！(I'll do my best.)
BODY - I've been getting menstrual symptoms in my old age. I never used to have cramps, bloating, or get super moody (I used to be moody all the time) in my teen and 20's, but now, it seems like a second adolescence or something. So I hope I find a father for the child(ren) I may want to have soon before my scrambled eggs stop dropping.
WORK - One of my toddlers had a bloody nose for two days last week. Her mother mentioned yesterday that she noticed an odor and took the girl to the doctor to discover that a piece of tissue had gotten lodged in her nasal cavity. The mother was angry and thought a teacher put it up there. My Japanese co-teacher and I were insulted that she would think we would be stupid enough to do something like that. The office manager posed the question to the teachers in a way that could be construed as insulting and mentioned that we would take responsibility for not watching her closely enough.
Mind you, in Japan, they sell nose tampons for allergies and runny noses in general, which as an allergy sufferer I think is great. (People wear them with surgical masks....another post to explain...so you don't "see" the nose tampons if they have them in.) Culturally, this practice of inserting absorbent material into nostrils is well-known AND said toddler has a grandmother in the house. Mind you #2, this toddler is in don't-touch-me-i-can-do-it-myself phase so we barely get to wipe her nose during the day. Mind you #3, I stuck a screw up my nose at 3 1/2 years old and almost had to go to the hospital, but my mom (hardcore as she is) used a bobby pin in the doctor's office parking lot to remove it because she didn't want to pay money for something so crazy. Bottom line, learn cultural health practices when dealing with children!
TODAY - I made tonjiru. Man said it was good. I like miso anything, so it was easy for me to like. I really dig the youtube channel I found it on "Cooking with Dog." The cook makes it look so easy! I keep wondering who the narrator is, though. If you have any easy recipes that don't involve regular oven cooking or lots of prep space, let me know. I also prefer recipes with less than 8 ingredients and less than two cooking methods (e.g. frying and boiling but not frying, boiling, and kneading lol)...FYI.
Sunday, January 18, 2009
blogs, butts, and mantras with tea, please
MIND-I have thought about it, read about it, and even created this blog account years ago, but I never wrote a single post. I read all my sister's posts and encourage her to keep writing, yet I let each week pass without writing anything about my experience here in Japan. 2009 is well on its way and as Obama prepares to officially take office, I will prepare to officially begin blogging. I know, my blogging is not as momentous, but like Obama says, it's because of me that he won the election. :)
BODY- I've been reading about butt muscles because recently I've been having butt pains. And it's only on one side (left FYI). I'm trying to figure out what I've been doing that would cause it, but I haven't come up with any explanations. I wish I knew why it hurts so I could quit doing that movement incorrectly. Maybe it's karma--I've been a pain in the a$$ so now I'm having a$$ pains. :) My friend who is a personal trainer says I just need to stretch it out. Here's to Butt Stretching!
WORK-This week I have to start potty training my nursery class. There are 12 toddlers ranging in age from 18-24 months. Last week I spent several hours reading about techniques, watching videos of potty training. I even had Tetsuya order "Everyone Poops" online for me. (Great book, btw.) I had all these big plans of creating a cardboard box pop-up display using actual photos of our toilet area, getting boy and girl dolls to model the potty process for them, and printing out a reward chart to use with stickers. Then, I went to the club. My Sunday was over just like that.
TODAY: I woke up at 6 pm, cleaned the apartment, showered, ate fast food, cooked stew, watched Japanese TV, checked email and SNSs, then ended up reading blogs of note. It's 1055 pm now and I have to sleep so I can be ready for tomorrow. It's cold but "I love winter" (my new mantra to help me overcome my hatred for this unnatural time of year), so as I drink lots of tea and stay indoors more, wish me blogging luck.
BODY- I've been reading about butt muscles because recently I've been having butt pains. And it's only on one side (left FYI). I'm trying to figure out what I've been doing that would cause it, but I haven't come up with any explanations. I wish I knew why it hurts so I could quit doing that movement incorrectly. Maybe it's karma--I've been a pain in the a$$ so now I'm having a$$ pains. :) My friend who is a personal trainer says I just need to stretch it out. Here's to Butt Stretching!
WORK-This week I have to start potty training my nursery class. There are 12 toddlers ranging in age from 18-24 months. Last week I spent several hours reading about techniques, watching videos of potty training. I even had Tetsuya order "Everyone Poops" online for me. (Great book, btw.) I had all these big plans of creating a cardboard box pop-up display using actual photos of our toilet area, getting boy and girl dolls to model the potty process for them, and printing out a reward chart to use with stickers. Then, I went to the club. My Sunday was over just like that.
TODAY: I woke up at 6 pm, cleaned the apartment, showered, ate fast food, cooked stew, watched Japanese TV, checked email and SNSs, then ended up reading blogs of note. It's 1055 pm now and I have to sleep so I can be ready for tomorrow. It's cold but "I love winter" (my new mantra to help me overcome my hatred for this unnatural time of year), so as I drink lots of tea and stay indoors more, wish me blogging luck.
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